Togo

Greetings

Men greeting Men – A handshake with the right hand is the most common form of greeting. Handshakes are often combined with a snap on the release for those who are friends. Handshakes tend to linger a bit.

Women greeting Women - It usually depends on relationship, but a handshake with the right hand is the most common form of greeting for formal and business situations. If friends, they’ll probably just do a verbal greeting and ff they haven’t seen each other in a while they may hug.

Greetings between Men and Women - A formal verbal greeting or a handshake with the right hand is the most common form of greeting for formal and business situations. Men and women typically do not touch each other in public, even if they are married.

Note: Togo has 37 ethnic tribes, and greetings may differ greatly between them. Each local language has a standard dialogue of greetings that must be said out of respect (usually 6-8 questions and responses). When greeting someone in power like a chief everyone will get down on a knee and say the greeting together while the chief gives the standard answers.

If shaking hands it is respectful to place your left hand around the wrist of your right hand while shaking. You always use your right hand to shake. If your right hand is occupied when you need to shake you offer your right wrist, never your left hand.

Communication Style

• The communication style of the Togolese highly depends on whom they're talking to. For example, a woman will communicate with a child much differently than she will with a man, even her husband.
• The Togolese are seldom direct or state exactly what they mean. It’s really rather the opposite. They’ll often say what they think you want to hear or what is expected to be said. It’s important to keep in mind the hierarchy of Togolese culture: men…women…children. Also, greater age usually implies greater respect.

• People tend to be direct but polite in many situations, especially when it comes to personal appearance or attributes. For example, the compliment, “you look fat today” or "you got fat" is common and should be taken as a positive remark.

• Skin color is also a big standard. People don’t hesitate to announce your skin color in public if you are lighter skinned than they are, even if you’re black. This is culturally acceptable and not at all rude.
• Sarcasm doesn't tend to translate very well, especially when it comes to making jokes.

Personal Space & Touch

• Personal distance varies depending on how well you know the person; generally an arm’s distance is fine.
• Often times, when speaking to an elder, it is important to keep more distance between you out of respect.

• Among business colleagues, touching is not appropriate. Among friends, either men or women, touching is appropriate on the arms or shoulders but not the lower body. Women tend to be much touchier than men and that is acceptable.

• Men and women seldom touch in public, even if married. If a man touches a woman it may be a signal that he is interested in her.

• You will often see two men walking together with their pinky fingers entwined; this is a sign of friendship and has nothing to do with homosexuality. (Homosexuality is completely taboo)

Eye Contact

• In most areas eye contact is acceptable, but one must not stare blatantly into the other’s eyes, especially when conversing with someone older than you.

• In general people do not make overly direct eye contact, especially if speaking to someone in power as that would be very rude.

• A man may make eye contact with someone equal (another man) or lower than himself on the hierarchy (a woman or child) but it is usually only held if he is angry. In rural and tribal areas, women almost never make eye contact with men.

Gestures

• The thumbs up sign is often used as a sign of congratulations or approval.

• One the most common signals in is the “hiss” noise used to get someone’s attention.

• To beckon someone you put your right hand up and open and close the fingers in a scratching motion. Be sure to always use the right hand.

Views of Time

• The expectation about time in is that there is no expectation. A meeting scheduled for 10 am means that most people will show up between 11 am and 12 pm, if they show at all. Things seldom happen “on time”.

• In many areas, a man will try to earn money any way he can, usually farming. Women are responsible for preparing meals, housework, and children in addition to a job like selling goods in the market. Generally women spend their entire day on these tasks with little or no downtime. If people don’t work, they don’t eat. So these duties are a priority to almost anything else as the livelihood of the family is dependent on them. Therefore even if someone tells you they’ll be somewhere at a certain time, it doesn’t typically hold much value.

• As some people say, “being late has become an illness,” meaning, that many people in Togo don't even have the notion of being on time.

• For important work events, being punctual is appreciated.
• Buses generally have no schedules or posted routes. They come when they come.

Gender Roles

• Traditionally the woman’s place has been at home with the kids, cleaning and cooking. Recently, with the feminist movement and modernism, women are accepted in the work force and are often seen working outside the home.

• Women in are incredible hardworking. It’s not uncommon to see a woman carrying a heavy load of goods like firewood to cook dinner with a baby on her back and a child in tow. She may even be breastfeeding while walking.

• Togolese society is incredibly role-driven and people usually do not step outside their roles, especially in rural and tribal areas.

• In most rural and tribal areas, a women must show respect to men at all times, especially her husband. Talking back is very disrespectful. She must always be dressed appropriately – clothes must be clean and her legs must always be covered (cultural, not religious). It is acceptable for her breasts to be uncovered as it is very hot during the day but she must never show her legs. She must complete all the housework each day in addition to child-rearing and preparing meals.

Taboos

• You must use your right hand for everything. The left hand is considered dirty and it’s extremely rude to offer your left hand or use it to beckon someone. Even in preparing meals women do not use their left hands. If your right hand is occupied when you need to shake you offer your right wrist, never your left hand.
• It is considered rude to smell food that has been prepared for you or ask what it is exactly that you’re eating. A meal prepared for you is a big deal in a starving country and you should accept it gratefully and without question.

Law & Order

• There is no legal drinking age. Alcohol is everywhere and it’s common to see kids going to the store to buy alcohol for a man.
• There is no legal age for buying tobacco. It's common to see kids buying cigarettes for elders.

• Persons violating Togolese laws, even unknowingly, may be expelled, arrested or imprisoned. Penalties for possession, use, or trafficking in illegal drugs in are severe, and convicted offenders can expect long jail sentences and heavy fines.

Other Observations

• You must have a thick skin while traveling in Togo. Don’t let people push you around and guilt you into buying something you don’t want. If you give change to a beggar expect a lot more people to show up and ask. People will always be watching, even staring at you.

• When purchasing items in the market or taking a taxi expect to pay more than the average Togolese would pay. All Togolese assume if you are white (not black) that means you are rich and should pay more. However, all prices are negotiable and you should never pay the first price asked for. This is cultural, not rude, so be blatant and ask them to lower the price. They expect it. If you choose not to bargain you make it that much more difficult for all the other tourists to get a fair price. Try to remember people don’t mean to be rude when you’re given a good deal of unwanted attention, especially if you’re white.

• The Togolese are open to foreigners and happy to help when asked.

• A random piece of trivia is that the tallest building in all of is the Sofitel Hotel in the capital of Lomé.
• Skin color is not a big issue. People don’t hesitate to announce your skin color in public if you are lighter skinned than they are, even if you’re black. This is culturally acceptable and not at all rude.